Date: Fri, 16 Feb 96 12:22:54 -0800
From: Xxx Xxxxx 
Organization: Information Systems
To: lars@xxxxxx.com

Lars,

I just read your "Get a Life" article, which brought up some points very near and dear to me. It was really quite a shock to my husband, the amount of time and effort that he was required to put in on childcare and home care when we had our child. However, even with this increased effort on his part I would say that he participates in only 10% of the chores to maintain the household and keep the family going. That leaves 90% for me. I really need a wife! I had a wonderful housekeeper/nanny for the first two years of my son's life. She did childcare, laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc. But it cost much more than we could affort to keep longer than absolutely necessary. I miss her very much.

My biggest concern right now is finding a way to spend enough time with my child so that he learns the values that I want to teach him. I have had to forego a lot of my own interests in order to give him more of my time and attention.

My solution to the working long hours problem is to return to work later in the evening after my son is asleep. My husband and I trade off nights, where one of us stays home with the sleeper, while the other can go out to pursue independent interests such as work or hobbies during the week. This allows us to stretch our time a bit, but brings the consequence that we hardly ever spend time together as husband and wife. I think this could have a negative long term effect on the marriage.

I regularly put in 50 hours per week while I was at [my previous job], but this was during the NANNY years. It would be much more difficult for me to do it now. I think more women are beginning to see the value in being June Cleaver, and are giving up either half or all of their career positions in order to pursue a homemaker career. I must admit, that it is starting to look more and more attractive.

Deb